The Olive Gal

green of skin, black of heart

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The Universe is Having a Good Laugh at My Expense
March 31, 2015April 1, 2015 The Olive Gal No Comments
  • Extreme Sarcasm

The Universe is Having a Good Laugh at My Expense

This morning, I asked my mom a question. I said, “I know people always tell you to stay positive. But how do you do that when every signal points to things not working out? How do…

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I’m in a Glass Case of Emotion
March 22, 2015 The Olive Gal 2 Comments
  • Extreme Sarcasm

I’m in a Glass Case of Emotion

There’s a reason why you all haven’t heard from me in a while. I’ve been trapped in a glass case of emotion. It’s called real estate hell. While the experience has been nothing short of dramatic…

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Buying and Selling: An Emotional Roller Coaster
March 3, 2015March 3, 2015 The Olive Gal 2 Comments
  • Extreme Sarcasm

Buying and Selling: An Emotional Roller Coaster

I’ve always hated roller coasters. The slow grinding of the gears as they inch their way up a steep incline. The rust-scented steel bar across your lap that either cuts off your circulation or feels loose enough…

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We’re Moving
February 25, 2015 The Olive Gal 1 Comment
  • Family

We’re Moving

It’s official. As of this Thursday afternoon, my first home will be on the market. A photographer is coming in to take snapshots for the listing, fliers are going out, and the open house is happening…

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My Toddler Is Now a Kid and My Whole World Has Changed
February 16, 2015February 16, 2015 The Olive Gal No Comments
  • Family

My Toddler Is Now a Kid and My Whole World Has Changed

Do you know how many times I’ve said, “No one told me this was going to happen” in my child’s short life? When breastfeeding didn’t happen naturally, I said, “No one said it was going to be…

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Dancing With My Son
February 6, 2015February 6, 2015 The Olive Gal 1 Comment
  • Dance

Dancing With My Son

Ever since my four-year-old son laid eyes on the Chandelier video, he’s been improv dancing in our living room trying to recreate the steps. He stands up on the couch, throws his hands out wide, and launches…

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I’m Not Impressed By Your Giant Snowstorm
January 28, 2015February 2, 2015 The Olive Gal No Comments
  • Extreme Sarcasm

I’m Not Impressed By Your Giant Snowstorm

You got 34 inches of snow, you say? You can’t get out of your slider door? You spent two days holed up with family watching movies and drinking hot cocoa and sliding down the hills in…

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I’m 34 Years Old and Went Shopping at Hot Topic
January 20, 2015January 20, 2015 The Olive Gal 2 Comments
  • Extreme Sarcasm

I’m 34 Years Old and Went Shopping at Hot Topic

Go ahead, judge me. I certainly did. I walked by the store in our local lame-ass mall this Saturday evening, and I saw me a Dr. Who Tardis dress hanging in the store window. The very…

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How to Rebel Against New Year’s Resolutions: Eat Like a Champion
January 15, 2015January 15, 2015 The Olive Gal 3 Comments
  • Food

How to Rebel Against New Year’s Resolutions: Eat Like a Champion

I entered into this New Year just like everyone else: fresh with optimism, full of heady ideas about eating healthy and making some smart choices in my life. That lasted all of one day. Remember last…

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The Single Stupidest Argument I’ve Ever Had With My Mother
January 5, 2015May 31, 2018 The Olive Gal No Comments
  • Family

The Single Stupidest Argument I’ve Ever Had With My Mother

My mom and I have butt heads many times over the last thirty-grumble-grumble years. Many, many times. A good many of them were emo-teenage arguments, like “You don’t understand me!” or “My life is so hard!”…

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  • theolivegal An absolutely stunning performance by Nick Offerman in Last of Us. As the Frank to my husband’s Bill, your tenderne… t.co/WXXh8t0fcF Time ago 1 Day via Twitter for iPhone Reply - Retweet - Favorite
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